Post by kiwismh on Apr 24, 2014 20:19:10 GMT
There is a divergence of opinion about whether Lee and Leslie has slept together and with the blog now have reached this point, now seems a good time to discuss. There are so many comments already on the JWWM pages I thought it might be a good idea to remove this topic to Ned's.
It could be argued they have slept together, and certainly Lee’s insomnia is on the face of it could easily be interpreted as an overdose of bedroom activity that doesn’t involve sleeping. And the familiarity that Leslie has with his apartment and changing clothes at his apartment again on the face of it could be interpreted as an indication of established intimacy. That was certainly my assumption back in the 1980’s when the series originally aired. However, with a good 25+ more years of life experience behind me since then, I think that conclusion is just a bit too obvious and there are other more subtle clues in this episode that indicate they haven’t consummated the relationship.
What bugged me most when I revisited the episode after all that time, and what to me is the biggest clue they haven’t slept together, is Leslie herself and her behaviour, which I interpret completely differently than I did all those years ago.
Firstly and most obviously she is different from Lee’s previous women. She clearly isn’t the sort of woman who would want a casual or non-exclusive relationship. She is looking for a steady, exclusive relationship. To me she wants to be romanced, and whilst she does not seem the sort of woman to fall into bed at the drop of a hat I get the feeling she would, after a few successful dates, expect to progress to a more intimate relationship.
But that hasn’t happened yet. Leslie is clearly not secure in her relationship with Lee – this is the most significant thing I noticed as I revisited this episode. It seems like they’ve known each other just a few weeks (maybe 4-8 weeks), been on a few dates when she’s been in DC, no doubt kept in touch by phone otherwise. Her actions (leaving his apartment door open) and Lee’s actions (quickly re-holstering his gun when he realises it is her in his apartment), and her very much one-sided conversation with Amanda all reveal she knows very little about Lee. She may now be harbouring an awareness that he knows more about her than she really knows about him.
Leslie seems to want to take that next step, possibly as a means to get to know him better, getting him to open up a bit more. So, she’s decided, probably encouraged by the black dress, to take the initiative – inviting herself to the apartment instead of waiting for Lee to call, laying out a romantic dinner setting, and she is the one initiating all the physical contact between them. But she just seems to be trying too hard, almost like she’s trying to force an outcome. If they had already been intimate, she would know she doesn't have to manoeuvre the evening to make it happen.
They just don’t appear to have that natural and knowing ease in each other’s company that physical intimacy brings to couples of a certain maturity who are mutually committed to growing a relationship. (Okay, I probably didn’t express that last bit very well but it’s hard to find the right words to express the concept. I hope you all get what I mean).
Leslie is also concerned to establish Amanda’s place in Lee’s life and how much Amanda knows about him. I believe if she and Lee had started a physically intimate relationship already she would have no such concerns about Lee’s commitment to her and wouldn't be fishing for info from Amanda.
No, I’m not saying a physical relationship naturally brings with it certainty and long-term commitment – we all know that ain't so! But in this case, Lee seems to be seeking an exclusive relationship and Leslie certainly wants that too, so I believe if they had become physically intimate Leslie would not seem so uncertain and Lee would be more relaxed around her.
In regard to Lee, deep inside he’s been fighting his attraction to Amanda for some time. As his admiration for her many qualities has grown over the last two years, his feelings for her have naturally intensified. It must be getting tougher and tougher for him to avoid these feelings. His latest avoidance tactic is to transfer his desire to experience a more serious on-going romantic relationship to someone else – someone Amanda-like but without the ready-made family, suburban normality, and life-long commitment (all things he admires and respects and fights for every day, but which he cannot see himself as good enough have or sustain). In denying the true object of his desires, he has set up an even greater conflict within himself. Much as he tries, this new relationship isn’t bringing him that heady mix of emotional and physical satisfaction, instead he’s tossing and turning at night unsettled by feelings he can’t identify or understand.
Lee undoubtedly wants this relationship to be different from his previous casual liaisons, but I have no doubt he would also want and expect the relationship to progress to physical intimacy after the initial courtship. Buying the dress for Leslie has been viewed by most of us as being something of an oddity, if not outright disturbing. But I am thinking Lee’s reasons for fixating on the dress are that although he likes and thinks he has romantic feelings for Leslie, his body hasn’t been responding to her as he would like or expect. Perhaps he recalls recent times when he has experienced physical excitement caused by something sexy like a little black dress - nothing to do with the woman wearing it at the time, of course. 
He reasons that if he puts Leslie in such a dress, his body will respond and that will kick start their physical relationship. He also probably thinks she will appreciate his romantic gesture in buying her such a personal item.
I feel if he was in a steady, loving and recently consummated relationship, he would be energised and happy the next day, not showing up at the office looking like something the cat dragged in. Previous hot ‘n heavy casual encounters that necessarily involved nights of Olympic sex and no love would leave him exhausted and not so chipper the next morning, but this relationship is supposed to be different.
I think the show ultimately leaves it to the viewer to decide, and we probably all come to different conclusions based on our own life experiences. But this is my two cents worth. Look forward to reading all your thoughts on the matter.
, this is ideal for me .. cos Neds will still have me... whahahahaaaa!!! 
